Nobody around... :(

The world said this, the world said that,
but nobody cared to know what said my heart.
Nobody ever looked through my eyes, nobody ever thought what I like or despise.

Nobody will ever see what I think, nobody will ever understand nything.
Nobody will ever get to know the pain I`m in...
Nobody will ever uncover the secrets within.

Time & tide waits for none & I`ll grow up as wished by everyone.
My tears are dry & I`ve forgtten 2 cry. But nobody will ever know why I said
"IMPOSSIBLE IS NOTHING"...

They will never know what I live (lived) for & what my life is!

FORBIDDEN LIFE

As the night creeps in
And silence befalls...
The faces seem to fade
Amidst the darkened walls....

But Men must come and Men must go,
As the night creeps in and silence befalls.

The meaning of death has finally struck me and am suddenly not able to find the strength to accept the existence of that.
DEATH ...!! How can a person who had been breathing life, talking walking, smiling,... a person in real flesh & blood be reduced to ashes. Living people... finally ending up in ashes. That’s what death is.!!

Biologically, the heart stops functioning, but for us... it’s the end of a life, and with it dies its hopes, wishes, dreams, its burdens, struggles and also happiness of so many other people.

And yet how easily we forget death...! May be not ‘forget’ but sooner or later we all get used to the sorrow of death – the fact that our dear & loved one is not with us... will never be with us anymore.

That’s what rebels in me tonight ... How can I permit my loved ones body to be burnt in ashes... Never to see him/ her again... never to hear that voice, that laughter... ad whom do I go to when I need help, when I need that particular person.

Will I find a substitute for this too...???
It’s a question for every body... How can we allow death?? Why don’t we have control over it ...?

And yet every life moves towards the sole destination... Death! The only permissible love of life is death...!

So I let the night creep in
And silence to befall...
I let the faces fade
Amidst the darkened walls....

And I cry and I cry...
Till the tears dry.
Until the night creeps into the silent walls.

15 PARK AVENUE

A very well appreciated movie made by Aparna Sen - a movie depicting one of the rare kinds of mental illnesses - Schizophrenia – a disease where a person lives in an unreal world and believes it to be as true as the real world is for us.
And a very commendable performance by Konkona Sen Sharma who led the role of the mentally challenged patient.

The movie made me think a lot and as usual my extent of imagination had no bounds.
Schizophrenic patients are so unlike the normal people, but still I found a hidden similarity with them.

For me and am sure many of us, our existence is substantiated with the co-existence of an unreal world - a world where all the otherwise impossible things happen... a world where all our suppressed dreams and wishes come true.

For me, in this world, I have with me the love that I had never succeeded in having in my real world. I have some hypothetical problems and situations which deeply affect me and make me cry to an extent where I forget that in actual they do not exist.
And strangest of all, for me, both the worlds operate simultaneously.
When I am in office, I let the real world take over me, though I can hear the call of the unreal world at the same time.
At home I let the latter take over and get so engrossed that often I forget the differentiation between reality and unreality... And yet I am normal.

...We are all normal till there is the fine line of differentiation between fact and imagination.

But just a thought : What happens when we cross the fine line of demarcation??? What happens when imagination takes over reality...?

Do we forget the real world totally? Do we get lost suddenly as Konkona did...???
Do we finally have the address of our dreams as Konkona did ...?

Do we ever get out of this world....???
Do we finally reach our “15 PARK AVENUE”....???